Margaret Paul, Ph.D, has an article in The Huffington Post, What You Judge Won’t Budge. In expounding the value to stop being judgmental, she explains, “When you judge yourself, you create an inner resistance. The way through this resistance is to move out of judgment and into compassion for yourself. Compassion opens the door to awareness and choice. It gives you the safe inner arena to see what you are doing — such as getting angry or creating clutter — and to decide what you really want to do differently. Compassion for yourself is essential to moving out of a stuck place. What you judge won’t budge”
While this is basically good advice, and lots of people want to stop being judgmental, and Dr. Paul writes lucidly about the problems associated with judging ourselves, she doesn’t provide a helpful answer. She suggests we should be compassionate with ourselves, but how do we do that? It’s not as simple as deciding, “OK…starting today at 5:03pm I’m going to be compassionate.”
This is just one example I find troubling in the mental health profession. People need more than good advice, they need to know how to alter their behaviors and attitudes.
A Practice That Teaches Us How To Stop Being Judgmental
Live Conscious offers a complete model that—when practiced—teaches us how to stop being judgmental. It begins by understanding and buying into certain Live Conscious principles. It includes a daily practice, a way of using language that eliminates praise and blame, brings us into the present moment, and teaches us to communicate without making other people wrong.
Fascinatingly, when we stop making other people wrong, we tend to stop making ourselves wrong. As a result, we begin to develop more understanding and compassion. The practice of using Live Conscious is one specific way to stop being so judgmental, stop caring so much when other people judge you, and start living a more compassionate life.